Are you feeling too aware and overburdened with the freedom of choice? Then try Brain Slug®! Great for a Halloween costume: just slap it on, put on a vapid, glassy-eyed look, and speak monotonously. This 'lil guy will live comfortable as a parasite on your head for as long as you as you have the brains to feed it.
From the most popular show in the history of all media (* statistics unproven), Futurama! The Brain Slugs
from the Brain Slug Planet seek only peace ... and living off of the brainwaves of intelligent species.
But hey, it's not their fault - they need to live too! And you can provide them a home they need for the low price of just a cup of coffee a day. Won't you think of the children slugs?
Besides, it's not like you NEED all that brainpower anyway. You have an overabundance of intellect since you're here at The Coolest Stuff Ever. (And you're very attractive, smell nice and are really quite funny. But flattery gets us everywhere...)
So why not let a Brain Slug® named Blerg suck on your juicy-sweet brainwaves for a while? It doesn't hurt at all PLUS it's quite the fashion statement in certain sectors of the galaxy.
You don't need all that thinking and free will anyway. We all have those dark tea-times of the soul, those late hours of the night when we wonder why we even exist in the first place. Does God exist, what happens when we die, how crazy it is that "Dog" backwards spells "God", whether or not to wear the same pants to work in the morning and all that.
Brain Slug® removes all those worries. Fret no more! Be secure in the knowledge that you're helping an entire species take over your home planet.
Some example interactions that happen with the wonderous joy of having a Brain Slug® attached to your skull are as follows:
Hermes: [After Bender knocks the slug off Hermes head.] Thank God I'm free of that nightmare!
Bender: Sorry, buddy. Here you go! [Bender replaces the brain slug.] s
Hermes: [monotonous] Thank you. It was cold down there on the floor.
Hermes: [monotonous] On to new business. Today's mission is for all of you to go to the Brain Slug Planet.
Zoidberg: What do we do there?
Hermes: [monotonous] Just walk around not wearing a helmet.